Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
