he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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