4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
