Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
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