she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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