Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
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