I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
