What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
