i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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