just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Randomize
