so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize