I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
