Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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