Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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