I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize