I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
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