Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
