Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
