Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
