If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
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