So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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