I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
We left the knife in your bed.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
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