That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
