what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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