We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
