I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Randomize
