I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Randomize