he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
