I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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