Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize
