The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
