so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Randomize