my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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