Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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