At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
