so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
It's official drugs can't kill me
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
