their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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