He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
