I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
