Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
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