Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
