so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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