my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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