Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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