this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
