Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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