hotel room ftw
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Randomize
