8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Randomize
