Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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