You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize